I think I left my heart in Maryland.

Natalie's hand in Grandma's hand

I left for Maryland on Thursday, March 31to meet my first grandchild.  I was supposed to stay until Sunday, April 2.  I felt so sad to be leaving my granddaughter.  On the way to the airport, my daughter said "too bad you won't be here tomorrow- it is supposed to be in the 70's and we could garden."
I arrived at the airport and did a quick check-in and went through security.  Everything was fine and on time.  By the time I walked to my gate, I started hearing people murmuring that our flight was going to be delayed significantly.  I was making a connection in Chicago at 9:45 p.m. and would have arrived in Indianapolis at 11:40 p.m. Suddenly, they bumped our flight to departure time to 9:45 p.m.  I got in line with a lot of other people to speak to an attendant.  The woman wasn't rude, but she nearly came over the counter emphatically saying that there were no flights. It was due to Southwest grounding 79 of their planes for inspection.   They could get me to Chicago, but they would have put me up in a room and I would have waited until Tuesday, April 5 to fly out.  I told them to just give me a flight out from Baltimore on Tuesday morning.  My daughter doesn't live far from BWI.  I called her and said "do you want to garden tomorrow?"  

I had the most wonderful visit.  My daughter and her wife were so kind with regard to Natalie.  My daughter let me bathe her, my daughter would ask what I wanted to dress her in and Grandma held Natalie a lot.  And,  my daughter and I had a wonderful visit.  I miss her and don't get to ever spend enough time with her.  The day we shopped for the plants, we picked plants together.  I always see other mothers and daughters out together and feel envious.  It was so nice for all of us to be together.  Every visit, I feel as if I know my daughter-in-law a little better, too. 

This is my first grandchild.  I had always heard how wonderful it is to have grandchildren, and thought to myself "yeah, yeah, yeah," but didn't have a clue what they were talking about.  It is a little bit of heaven on earth. 

As I sat and held her I listened to the rhythm of her breathing.  It might be slow and even, so soft you can barely hear it.  Or, it might be quick and short, a series of short pants.   I would watch her eyes open slightly, then close, her face scrunch up, a brief smile pass across her lips, her mouth form into an "o," and then her face would relax.  I never grew weary of watching her. 

On Sunday afternoon, my daughter said "you can just hold her until you leave if you want to."  I spent a lot of time in the nursery, rocking her.  



Rocking in her nursery.  I bought this chair for them.

I took two outfits out.  In this photo, she is wearing on of the outfits that I bought her.  We went shopping while I was out and I bought some things that they picked out.

On Monday, it got up to eighty one degrees and my daughter and I gardened and pulled out some over-grown bushes and put in about fifteen plants.  The beginnings of Natalie's garden.  I'll continue to work on it as long as they live there. 

Because of getting the bonus day with them, by Tuesday morning, I felt a little better about going home. 

I've had a few inquiries about my mother as I haven't posted for a while.  Mother was transferred to a different facility in my hometown, and she continues with her physical therapy with hopes of going home soon. 

When I got home last Tuesday evening, I couldn't get on to the Internet on my Dell laptop.  Last night was the first time I could access the Internet.  I think it was just too overloaded with junk.  I spent hours last night deleting needless photos, bought an external hard-drive for the photos I want to keep and did a total system back up with that.  Then I deleted all games and apps and junk on my facebook account.  I have heard that the games, etc. on facebook will slow down your system, but had not experienced that in the past. 

Dug is out of the country in Nicaragua with an old buddy of his.  The house has been quiet and I've been introspective.  I've been trying to find my heart, but I think I left it in Maryland.